I can and I will

The last few weeks have seen some big changes in my diet. I did "mostly" well, with a little cheating here and there. The good news is I'm already feeling better. I've lost 4 lbs, but more importantly, my fat mass has gone down and my muscle mass has gone up. Just what I like to hear.

What don't I like to hear? "You're going to be much more strict for the next 30 days". Really. Enter my old friend skepticism. I will definitely try. More than try. I will offer a valiant effort.

No more corn. Didn't really like that news. No more wine. I liked that even less. No more coffee. Not even decaf. No more chocolate. **silence** Can you repeat that? I didn't understand. We compromised on a small piece of dark chocolate when I am craving it.

I went out and had one last hurrah tonight with a friend. Didn't go too crazy; corn chips and a glass of wine with my otherwise healthy dinner. I might need to make a bowl of popcorn tonight and spend a moment saying goodbye to the only substitute I had left for chips.

I am trying to focus on the positive. I am feeling distinctly healthier than I was 3 weeks ago. And I've eased myself into the "no complex carbs" rule so, learning to obey the rules daily shouldn't be so horrible. I had bread for the first time in weeks because I was starving and it was the only thing to be had. I felt awful the next day, so there is some wisdom to this diet. Also, she took some blood for the food sensitivity testing. I am actually quite curious to see the results of that. She attempted acupuncture... I had to ask her to stop. It was awful and my shoulder hurt for the next hour.

Getting back to good is going to be far from painless. But I can and will do it. Right now, in this moment, I am making that promise to myself. I can. I will.